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Monthly Archives: March 2011

Complaint Lists – Part I

Complaint List #1: Songs I wish I could un-hear and un-know

by Kristy

Sometimes just living in our world means you will hear terrible pop songs, against your will and repetitively, so that eventually you can magically hum the tune and sing along without ever trying to do so.  And you wish that those memory erasers from Eternal Sunshine could come eradicate this annoying knowledge.  Herein, my top songs to erase from my brain, when that technology becomes available:

1. Hootie and the Blowfish (anything in their catalog….why did this tone-deaf group exist in the first place?)

2. Hey Soul Sister (Train)…the way you write terrible songs ain’t fair, ya know

3. Party in the USA (Hannah Montana or whatever that gummy-smile girl is named).  I hate that I love this song.  Or I love that I hate it.

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Posted by on March 31, 2011 in Kristy, Top Fives

 

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8 Reasons to Swap Classes with a Dog

by Lizzy

After reading Kristen’s post titled “How to Love a Bully, Fowl, and Yourself,” I was initially empathetic to poor T Rex in his dog obedience school. As I sat in my own class, “Information Systems in Libraries and Information Centers,” I felt a kindred spirit with the dog.  Both of us have to survive weekly classes that make us better up-standing citizens and teach us how to conform to society’s behavioral expectations. We wait quietly while we are directed to perform whatever whims our instructors have decided upon and are judged by our tough exteriors while we are really sensitive, loving beings inside (okay it was a long class – maybe this is pushing it!).  The point is that after I spent some time pondering these similarities it struck me…Rex’s classes are WAY better than mine, and here are the reasons why I would swap my plight with his:

1. Simple Tasks
– Just think for a moment how easy an A would be if your tasks included: “go right”; “go left”; “sit”; “stay”.  I would trade my upcoming 30 page analysis of integrated information systems for a simple “stop growling at the strangers” assignment in a heart beat.  Yes, I know you will say dogs are dumb and that is a lot for them to handle…yada yada.  But did you know that some scientist think sperm whales assign unique names?  I pose the question; do we really know how much a species is capable of?
(http://www.wired.com/wiredscience/2011/03/sperm-whale-names/#)

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Posted by on March 31, 2011 in Guest Listers

 

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Top Things NOT to Purchase from Skymall

By Kristy and Kristen

Kristy’s Picks:

1. Tranquil Sounds Oxygen Bar, $299.99
This woman does not look tranquil, nor does she appear to be enjoying any sort of ‘bar’.  Maybe someone should give her the polite tip that oxygen is available for free in our atmosphere, which is all around her.  This product is also a great example of pseudo-scientific claims being used to sell products.  Case in point “Work, stress, drinking and environmental factors deplete our oxygen and affect our health.”  Absolute rubbish.

2. Wine and Liquor Accelerator, $59.99
If you were excited like me, you may have thought that this amazing product would do for 1 glass of wine what 2 glasses of wine can do (and half the calories!).  Alas, this is just a crappy way to ‘age’ your wine.  This product features “Neodymium (definitely made-up word) magnets”.

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Some Lists for Science Nerds – Part 2

by Kristy

If you’re a techno-addict and always have your laptop, smart phone or iPod/iPad attached to you, then these podcasts, e-newsletters and smart phone apps are a must.

Please add any of your favorites to the comments section

Science Podcasts worth checking out:

1. From Canada: http://www.cbc.ca/quirks/

bbc

2. The podcast from the Encyclopedia of Life:

http://education.eol.org/podcast

3. Great math podcast: http://www.mathforprimates.com/

“Finally a Podcast for Simians, by Simians”

4. Weather related blog from Minnesota:

http://minnesota.publicradio.org/radio/podcasts/jet_streaming/

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How to Love a Bully, Fowl, and Yourself

by Kristen

I require meat to live.

In Georgia, everyone has a crazy pit bull and they are just called “dogs.” Upon returning to the North, I learned I have a “reactive” dog of the “bully breed.”  I would like to state, before I get too deep into this, that I believe pit bulls get a bad rap and are loving, sweet companions. My pit bull, T Rex, was rescued from a dog fighter, acts crazy, and thus fits pretty neatly into the stereotype. Needing to reintegrate into society, we signed up for a Reactive Dog Class (the polite way of saying aggressive). In this course, I mostly learn about myself (I am too silly, I need to be a bigger presence, jokes about aggression don’t land in this crowd), but I’ve also had to learn something else: how to cook chicken. Because I am a recovered vegan, my dog has never tasted such a thing. His food has always been meat, but not from my table. Last week in class, our trainer offered him some chicken and T Rex suddenly saw no other dog in the room.

Sometimes love means accepting something you find disgusting. All challenges follow the classic coping steps.

1. Wipe That Look Off Your Face (Denial)
Guess who cares that you’ve never been to the meat section of a grocery store before? No one. And don’t get all high and mighty, telling people, “it is for my dog” because you’ll sound nuts and/or snobby. Regardless of the motivation, this is what you buy now, so stop making nauseated faces.

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Posted by on March 30, 2011 in Kristen

 

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A Brief Glance into a List Obsessed Life

by Lizzy

Provided are sections extracted from a double sided 81/2 x 11 list.  As you might have determined…this is my grocery list.  I will give you a minute to take in that concept….

The list, in its entirety, is glorious.  Notice the lines that enable quantities to be displayed.  Additional space has been added in order to fill in any of those last minute needs.   Never again do you face a Monday morning, glaring at the fridge, knowing you need to examine its contents in order to have a successful grocery trip after work, ALONE!  With my comprehensive, customizable list you simply let it tell you (or your husband/partner) what the hell to buy!  What you like!  Alone, one may forget important items like beer or toiletries.  But, if the list is utilized correctly, you will find yourself properly prepared for any of life’s nastiest messes.

 

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Things We’re Tyrannical About – March 2011

Kristy is Tyrannical about:
1. Reading about Hawaii. Sarah Vowell has a new book, and many friends have recommended Maui Revealed…A travel list is being prepared for my June trip, of course.

2. Survivorman. While I don’t expect to find myself in one of his harrowing situations, I enjoy learning how to avoid hypothermia and make a slingshot in the boreal forests.

3. The merger of Newsweek and The Daily Beast. (I may become a Newsweek subscriber now that Tina Brown has taken over).  The Daily Beast has some great lists, too.  http://www.thedailybeast.com/

4. Helping out by donating to Japan (SEE SEPARATE list of how you can help, below).  And following the uprisings in the Middle East, Especially via The Guardian’s interactive map:
http://www.guardian.co.uk/world/interactive/2011/feb/17/arab-world-protests-bahrain-map

5. Stocking the bar with Pisco – I’m on the hunt for a great bottle, so if you have suggestions let me know!  A great bar should always be stocked with a list of necessities…like Pisco and interesting bitters.

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