1. Practice balancing exercises before entering any metro station. This will ensure absolute control while being shuffled around a metro car. Remember, if you can stand without hands…then you look cool.
2. Platform placement is crucial for commuting comforts.
3. If you are claustrophobic – get over it. Your train will be “holding” in a tunnel under the Potomac River at some point.
4. Be aware. Scout out the best spots to stand in a car, if you can get next to a door without having to step off at every station – that is awesome. I recommend that you do not intentionally stand in the middle section between doors…you will get your ass knocked around (only acceptable if you are secretly craving human contact).
5. Walk with purpose after exiting/entering a station or car…because you are important.
6. If you are a new rider but do not want to look like a new rider, keep the following in mind: do not look around or make eye contact (after a while your neck muscles will be conditioned and staring at the floor will not hurt so bad); do not speak loudly (better if you do not speak at all); do not look at the rail maps inside the train (keep a small one in your pocket); do not lean on the poles (other people have to hold on you know); and finally, get the hell out of the way (be aware that upwards to 20 people typically have to get off and others back on the train in 5-10 seconds).
7. Learn to get really, really close to people without being a creepster.
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